The Voices in Frank's Head

I laughed so hard from watching this video that I out of my chair. The Dangers of Oral Sex!

I was working on the set for a local band's music video the other day. It's been awhile since I've done one. I figured it was about time. Anyway, the band had some fans show up to be groupies for this video. The interesting thing is that one of the young women who came clearly had more stuffed into her tube top than just herself. At first, I didn't think much about it. She wasn't the first woman to try such a thing and I doubt she'll be the last. The problem was that after an hour or so, whatever was in her top started to fall downwards. It wasn't long before her "boobs" were extending almost to her abdomen. (How it was that she didn't notice herself is beyond me, but that's another subject all together.) I knew I couldn't put something like this in the video, but I really wasn't sure how a gentleman could possibly tell a woman something like this. I called one of my friends, Lee Runchey , hoping to get some advice on how to ...

It looks like I'm not the only person who is a fan of Keira Knightley . Ever since the two of them started working together in the upcoming movie The Edge of Love , Sienna Miller simply cannot stop singing Keira's praises according to a recent published report . I have to say, though, after reading more about The Edge of Love , I'm really looking forward to seeing it. Not only does it have Keira Knightly and Sienna Miller; it's also being directed by John Maybury , who directed Keira in another cool indie flick The Jacket . Plus, as if that's not enough, the screenplay for The Edge of Love was written by Sharman MacDonald - Keira Knightley's mother. With all of that tying things together, life on the set of The Edge of Love must have been interesting.

In the spirit of the PC/Mac commercials, someone has posted a series of DC/Marvel comics commericials on YouTube. They simply crack me up. This is the most recent one. The rest of them are available here .

There are something that I simply can't believe when their forwarded to me by email. I'm not talking about the ones that claim I'll make oddles of cash by forwarding some stupid email to 10 of my friends. I know enough not to fall for that cyber-garbage. I'm talking about the news stories that I get. The ones so odd that they make me do a double take. Saks Fifth Avenue is a perfect example of this. The Associated Press reported recently that the U.S. Postal Service had issued the shoe department at Saks. A shoe department with its own ZIP code? Granted, it's an impressive shoe department: 8,500 square foot showroom; VIP room for private shopping; Shoe repair available; Spacious seating; and Refreshments (to prolong the dropping in "shop 'til you drop"). Of course, in hindsight, I shouldn't be too suprised that Saks convinced the post office to issue a ZIP code for its shoe department. It all goes back to what Seth Godin talked about in his ...

Memorial Day Weekend 2007 is now in the history books. 4th Friday was an unqualified blast. The press conference went off without a hitch. After it, I managed to sneak over to the Ren Cen to see Keira Knightley in Pirates of the Caribbean . The movie was so good that I would have been happy to watch even if it didn't have Keira in it. Of course, the fact that it did have her in it just made things that much better. Later that night, Mitch Ryder proved that he can still rock just as hard as he did years ago. I was introduced to The Flask , a new rock band that includes Kid Rock's former lead guitarist Kenny Olson - they were scary good. Take a look at their MySpace page for a list of upcoming shows and samples of their music. If any of them are near you, I definately recommend checking them out. Oh, and after all of the concerts, there was some guy who showed a few indie films in Campus Martius Park. After that ended at around 1 in the morning, Nicole and I headed...

I wondered, in a post last week, what would happen if I included a reference to both Melissa Theuriau and 1731 Seminole in one post since those were the two most common keywords to be used when people found this blog in one of the various internet search engines. I even went so far as to wonder what would happen if I started the rumor that Melissa Theuriau was now living in 1731 Seminole or, better yet, that she was starring in a porn that was being filmed at 1731 Seminole. Well, thanks to Google Analytics and a week's worth of results, I now have the answer to that question. Adding a reference to 1731 Seminole in my most recent post brought eight new people to my blog via Google and the other search engines. I didn't get any new traffic by mentioning Melissa Theuriau's name, but that might have been different if I spelled her name correctly the first time. Opps!

Jessica Alba remarked in this month's issue of GQ that she wanted to be known for more than what she looks like in a bikini. My first reaction was, "Oh, cry me a river. When you're working for the big studios, and collecting millions of dollars each time, you have to know that the roles they give you won't be the most artistically fulfilling." However, I took a look at her filmography on IMDb.com and learned that, in addition to the big budget Hollywood films that she is perhaps best known for, Jessica Alba also did some low budget stuff and at least one true indie, Bill . The movie is about a man who is fed up with his job, is married to a cheating wife and whose life changes when he start to mentor a rebellious teen. I have to respect anyone who isn't happy with the way their life or career is going and actually does something proactive about it. Oh, and while she's doing it, she still looks darn good in a bikini.

Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End set a record for the biggest Memorial Day weekend opening ever. It raked in $142 million at the box office over the extended weekend according to Variety . I would love to say that me mentioning the movie several times in this blog had something to do with it. However, I know better. It had much more to with the fact that a) it's an established movie franchise, and b) it has Keira Knightley . (Okay - there are some cool people in the movie besides her. That's just a bonus.) Of course, if fellow Detroiter (and Pirates producer) Jerry Bruckmeimer wants to send me a check for pimping his movie anyway - I'd totally cash it.

I use Google Analytics to give me an idea about who it is that reads this blog and how they find me. It satisfying my curiousity immensely and, in the case of the blog for my neighborhood , helps me convince certain beaucrats that they should take blogs seriously. Anyway, it turns out that when people visit this blog, a little more than half of them came from one search engine or another. Google Analytics also tells me what folks were searching for when they found me via a search engine. And that's the really interesting part. It turns out that the most common keywords that people used when they found me were 1731 Seminole , which is Jack White's former house - something that I blogged about last August , and Melissa Theuriau , the French TV reporter that I mentioned last April whose face you see to the left. I suppose if I started a rumor that Melissa Theuriau was moving to 1731 Seminole, thereby combining those two keywords into one internet search, then traffic on this b...

The Chinese fortune cookie from last night wasn't totally off-base. It looks like I could get a business loan now. However, I should be able to get a much better deal if I a) raise another few grand in cash and b) apply for a loan that includes phases 1 and 2 of my company's expansion - instead of doing getting a loan for phase 1 now and a second one for phase 2 in another couple of months. Welcome to the world of corporate finance!

I'm meeting tomorrow morning with the folks from Comerica Bank to talk about an SBA loan . I’m looking to expand my production company in a new direction (selling video content via cell phones). I swung by the Chinese place near me for some take out this evening. My fortune cookie read, "You will do well to expand your business." As far as omens go, that one is both freaky and cool. Anyway, I just thought I'd mention it.

I was flipping through the morning newspaper the other day. They had this short little blurb in it about Keira Knightley . Needless to say, anything with her name pretty much captures my attention. Anyway, it would appear that Ms. Knightley told Vogue that while she was in the Bahamas filmming Pirates of the Caribbean , she was so overwhelmed with phone calls and such that she actually threw her BlackBerry into the ocean. My first thought upon reading this was, "Dang, Keira! Couldn't you have just turned the thing off?" Oh, well. The fact of the matter is that it's her BlackBerry and she can throw it pretty much anywhere she wants. By the way, I actually tried coming up with suggestive comments about cell phones and water - but I couldn't come up with a thing. I think I'm losing it.

One of the things that I do on a volunteer basis is coordinate the public relations efforts for Detroit Synergy . I was kind of geeked this afternoon to learn that not only did my efforts manage to put their Bike to Work Day efforts on the radio, but that the whole thing was picked up by MSNBC . Personally, I can't help but feel that this calls for some kind of a celebration.

It's taken me much longer that it otherwise should have. However, my entry in the Detroit Video Contest is now on-line. You can check it out below.

I made a short film called The Sleepy Guy last summer that is currently making its way around the film festival circuit. It's a comedy about a guy who simply cannot wake up for work in the morning in spite of everything that his wife, his next door neighbor and two nurses do to help him. One of the super talented artists who contributed music to it was Detroit-native (and kick ass rocker) MoZella . I just found out that her song "Going Home" will be featured on Bones tonight. (8 p.m. on Fox TV.) The show is worth watching just for the MoZella tie-in.

Oh, what a weekend! I could say that it was so good that I didn't get a chance to post about it until today. The reality, however, was that yesterday was simply one of those Mondays that made everyone feel like Garfield . Anyway, Bravo Bravo! was a blast. As usual, it featured wall-to-wall beautiful people throughout the Detroit Opera House and enough booze to float a battleship. It was an open bar during the entire event. My friends and I all tried to drink so much that the theatre lost money by having us there. (I'm not sure if we succeeded, but it sure was fun to try.) Saturday started at Green Brain Comics in Dearborn with Free Comic Book Day . I picked up issue zero of Justice League of America , plus Batman & the Monster Men as well as Pirates vs. Ninjas . If they had baseball cards at Green Brain, it would have completed my temporary return to childhood. After that, it was off to Belle Isle where I shot a pick-up shot for my entry in the VisitDetroit.com po...

This evening is Bravo Bravo! - a fundraiser for the Michigan Opera Theatre and one of the coolest parties of the year. I've got a ticket and I'm meeting a bunch of people there. (Including my friend Augie who probably needs copious amounts of alchohol after learning this morning that he didn't get the job he applied for in Ferndale.) Tomorrow is Free Comic Book Day , which means that I'll be at my local comic book store as soon as they open to collect some free comics and recapture a piece of my childhood. (As a great wise man once said, "Free stuff is cool!") Tomorrow is also Cinco de Mayo, which means that southwest Detroit will be transformed into one gigantic margarita. (Okay - before any of my friends at the Mexicantown CDC hit the "comment" link - yes, I know there are lots of things going on tomorrow that do not involve tequila and that there's more to Cinco de Mayo than simply getting drunk - it's just that I'm selective in ...

Today was a rather weird day; weird that is in little ways. It started with me in my office at a little after 8:30 this morning. I reached for the phone and accidentally knocked over a can of Coke that I had on my desk. It promptly poured onto my computer hard drive, which sits just to my left. The weird part is that I had Taco Bell for lunch yesterday. They gave me a huge stack of napkins when I went through the drive through and most of them were sitting on top of my computer. I didn't plan for it, but the stupidity I usually when I knock something over was mitigated by sensation of accomplishment at having the forethought to put those napkins there. Granted, I didn't put the napkins there thinking that they would protect my computer from spilled Coke. I just dropped them there because it was a convenient place to put them. However, it only seems appropriate that a sense of stupidity at doing something by accident could be offset by a sense of accomplishment at doing so...

Somewhere in Detroit, there's a bartender who is wondering how he is going to pay their rent. It's my Christian duty to find him and drink enough booze to help this brother out. Before doing that, I just wanted to let everyone know that my Uncle Chuck's condition has improved. He is stable although the doctors would like to transfer him to a nursing home next week. Thank you to everyone who kept him in your thoughts and prayers these past few days. Oh, and before I run out the door, I also wanted to share this video that I found on-line.