The Voices in Frank's Head

I thought about using my mad video editing skills to create a video tribute to the men and women in America's armed forces. However, as any glance at YouTube will reveal, there is no shortage of such works. There really isn't anything left for me to contribute. Instead, I thought I would take a moment to honor the troops by showcasing some of the videos that they made themselves to deal with the monotony of life in a combat zone. The 380th Air Expeditionary Wing out of Al Dhafra Air Force Base in the United Arab Emirates handles air refueling, reconnaissance, and combat support for operations in both Afghanistan and Iraq. More importantly, as this video below shows, the airmen of the 380th are very hot. The job of securing the personnel and equipment of the U.S. Air Force is done be a dedicated team of security policemen. These brave men and women are ready to handle any hostile force that approaches and, as this video below shows, they are clearly ready for American Idol ...

The Congress in Brazil recently passed a bill to  add warning labels to lingerie . The matter is now pending before Brazillian President Dilma Rousseff . Care to See My Warning Label? If this bill is enacted, all bras sold in Brazil will henceforth carry a label, encouraging their wearer to check herself for breast cancer. Panties will carry one reminding women that condom use may prevent cervical cancer. Not to be left out, men will see a message in their underwear reminding them to be screened for prostate cancer if they are over the age of 40. I, for one, have always thought that women should come with warning labels. These, however, are not the kind that I was thinking about.

I had this long post planned out. I was going to take Harold Camping's  prediction that the Rapture was going to happen on Saturday apart, show precisely how little he knows about the Bible, and expose him once and for all as a charlatan. But this is so funny that everything else that I could say is moot.

I picked up two more mayorships on Foursquare today and it's not even 2 p.m. I'm now the Mayor of the New Center One Building  in Midtown as well as 3 Nicks Bar & Grill in Warrendale. The photo at right really doesn't relate to either of those things. It just demonstrates, once again, that a hot blonde goes with any blog post. And this is one of the many reasons why I love the internet.

The Space Shuttle Atlantis is getting ready for her final voyage into space. The folks at NASA posted a photo of her being hoisted in the Vehicle Assembly Building. yfrog Photo : http://yfrog.com/h2r1t1j Shared by NASA

There's a new book out by Annie Jacobsen entitled  Area 51: An Uncensored History of America's Top Secret Military Base . Since I have a science fiction manuscript pending, called The Roswell Chronicles , I was interested in this had to spend a decent amount of time today reading. In her book, Ms. Jacobsen makes several arguments about the legendary, ulta-secret facility known as Area 51 . One of her reports, and the one that I'd like to talk about the most, is the contention that the aliens who crashed in the New Mexico desert in summer of 1947 were actually the result of a Soviet human experimentation program that was design to educe panic within the American population. Before I go further, I believe a brief excerpt from Ms. Jacobsen's book is order. This is the crux of her assertion. The child-sized aviators in this craft [that crashed in New Mexico] were the result of a Soviet human experimentation program, and they had been made to look like aliens a la Orson ...

The Space Shuttle Endeavor launched this morning in a textbook perfect launch from the Kennedy Space Center. This was the final launch of Endeavor before it is retired and the second to last launch of shuttle program. For anyone who missed it, video from the Endeavor launch is available below.

ABC confirmed yesterday that Detroit 1-8-7 has been cancelled. I'm disappointed with this news. I continue to believe that if they made a drama from the beginning, instead of starting it as a "fake documentary"/comedy, then the show would've been a tremendous success. The writers and producers tried to retool it in a hurry, but they just weren't able to. I simply hope that this serves as a learning opportunity to every television executive as well as every writer in the business. Murder can make for a compelling drama. However, it makes for a terrible comedy.

Katy Perry  is on the cover of Vogue  this month. I did what I always do when I see her on a magazine cover. I looked at her left breast. Magazines always put the most interesting, thought-provoking questions next to Katy Perry's left breast when she is on a cover. Each of her breasts may appear to be equal at first glance. However, her left one is clearly more of an intellectual than its twin. This, of course, is why it generally attracts a higher quality of copy. Katy Perry's Left Breast Wants to Know This time around, however, I regret that I am disappointed. The best copy that Katy Perry's left breast was able to attract was the question  Michele Bachmann: Hot or Not? Really, now? That's the best that Katy Perry's left breast could attract? "Michele Bachmann: Hot or Not?" That is a question that isn't worth asking, in my opinion, let alone putting on the cover of a national magazine next to Katy Perry's left breast. Michele Bachmann, af...

Philip DeFranco , who is one of my favorite YouTubers, posted a question on his Facebook page earlier this week. He asked, what was the best mattress to have sex on? Spring, foam, or water? I chimed in, sarcastically, to say that the best option was neither - a hammock is infinitely superior. I checked back a little while later and noticed that five people indicated that they liked my comment. I was pleasantly surprised. Five people liked my oddball sense of humor. But then I clinked on the link to see who those five people were. And noticed that four of the five were girls - all either currently in high school or just recently graduated from high school. Two thoughts came to mind at that point. First, I felt like a pervert for even looking at the Facebook profile of a girl in high school. Second, and perhaps most importantly, I reminded myself once again that if I ever have a daughter, there will be a moat around our house and her internet usage will be strictly mo...

Back in the 1960s, there were some great political protests in the United States. Ever since then, we've gotten rather lazy at it. A bunch of people, a few signs, a celebrity speaker, maybe a catchy chant if we were lucky. That was pretty much it. Throughout the Middle East, however, we've seen massive demonstrations that put ours to shame, all organized using the social media platforms that were invented in the United States. She Doesn't Like Dirty Rats My personal favorite for a political protest, though, comes from Russia. There have been a multitude of young people over there protesting the political corruption that runs rampant in their country. One group of young women, however, added an entire new twist to the matter by creating a calendar of themselves protesting in their lingerie . Each month features a different young woman in her underwear with humorous but provocative caption. The one at right, for example, reads "Dirty Rats Are Disgusting." Ano...

I was at the grocery store the other day doing my weekly shopping. Since I'm a bachelor, this consisted heavily of lunch meat, microwave dinners, and beer. While standing in the check out line, though, I couldn't help but not notice Hayley Williams  on the cover of Cosmopolitan . Hayley Williams Asks the Wrong Question My first thought upon seeing this was, "Oh, so that's what Hayley Williams looks like with her clothes on ." But then I noticed one of the articles in this month's issue of Cosmo , "Call Him or Text: The New Rules." Silly, silly, Cosmo , I thought to myself. The correct answer to that conundrum is neither, just show up with a sandwich. If a woman does that, she is guaranteed to get better results than with either a phone call or a text message. She doesn't even have to look like Hayley Williams (although it certainly doesn't hurt). She just has to show up with a sandwich to get her guy to to do pretty much whatever it i...

I wanted to take a quick moment to wish everyone a happy Star Wars Day. If you're not familiar with Star Wars Day, I just happen to know a young woman in a Princess Leia costume who is eager to tell you all about this august holiday. Now, where did I put my light saber?

According to those fun loving, party animals at Google Analytics, an average of one person every day finds my blog as a result of a search for "Supergirl porn". It's all a result of this post on Supergirl from last summer. Anyway, there is no actual porn on my blog (Supergirl or otherwise). However, for the benefit of those who do find this blog as a result of such as search, as well as for the general amusement of everyone else, give you this image below. Kudos, by the way, go out to Dr. Zaius  of the Zaius Nation Blog for finding this gem. I also found his blog via Google.

To recap the chaotic events of the past several hours, President Barack Obama announced late last night that the U.S. had killed terrorist leader Osama bin Laden . The body of this dead terrorist, according to several news reports, was dumped into the ocean. The supporters of President Obama are happy. His critics, however, believe that either: The whole thing was most likely faked; He doesn't deserve credit for it; or It wouldn't have been possible without George W. Bush . I believe we can all agree the important thing here is there's a new episode of How I Met Your Mother beginning in approximately two hours.

The city of Barcelona, Spain voted recently to ban wearing bikinis anywhere other than swimming pools, beaches, adjacent streets, and beach walks. Anyone caught wearing such an outfit could face a fine ranging from 120 - 300 euros, which translates into $178 - $445. Kristen Can't Wear This in Barcelona Quite frankly, I'm not sure what part of this news disturbs me more. Is it the fact that there will presumably be fewer women wondering the streets of the second largest city in Spain in skimpy bikinis? Or could it be that I have now seen one more reminder of the fact that the Euro is worth 48% more than the U.S. dollar? It's really hard to say which one is more troubling to me. I might have to spend some more time looking at this photo of Kristen Bell  in a bikini and report back.