The Voices in Frank's Head

Keira Knightley  is on the cover of the Russian edition of Elle  this month. I'm just glad that they decided to get rid of the second "L" in the magazine's title. Otherwise, it would've been covering Keira's face.

I have to confess, I had no idea who Hayley Williams  was prior to this morning nor did I have any idea who the band Paramore was. In fact, now that I do know, I'm not all that certain that I really care about Paramore. But I digress. The thing is, sometime last night, Hayley Williams' Twitter account was reportedly hacked. This resulted in a photo of Hayless Williams topless making its way onto the internet. Hayley Williams insists that it was a simple security breach. Personally, I can't help but feel that this smells too much like a publicity stunt. Either way, the photo is out there and a lot more people suddenly know who Hayley Williams is - coincidence or not. Oh, and yes - it has taken an enormous amount of restraint for me to not show the uncensored version of that photo.

I love this photo. It's NASA's image of the day for today.  Their description of it follows. At NASA's Kennedy Space Center in Florida, an adult osprey guards its young in a nest built on a platform in the press site parking lot, backdropped by the 209-foot by 110-foot American flag painted on the side of the Vehicle Assembly Building. The Merritt Island National Wildlife Refuge coexists with Kennedy Space Center and provides a habitat for 330 species of birds, including the osprey, and a variety of other wildlife. Kennedy's press site is located at the turn basin in Launch Complex 39, making it an ideal osprey nesting place.

Um, wow! There are times that I just don't know what else to say.

I was flipping through this month's issue of GQ . After spending an hour or so ogling Victoria's Secret model  Miranda Kerr , I eventually noticed the various articles. I even noticed the articles that didn't involve Miranda Kerr. But I digress. Anyway, once I was done reading the various articles, I eventually noticed the advertisements. In particular, I noticed all of the ads for cologne. There were a lot of ads for cologne, which isn't all that surprising. This was GQ , of course. The thing that surprised me was how may of them offered a free weekend bag as a gift when purchasing the advertised cologne. Curve. Calvin Klein. Zegna Colonia. If they offered a gift with purchase, it was always a weekend bag. I can't help but feel that this routine of offering a gift with purchase has become rather played out. There are too many people thinking the same thing, over and over again. And fashion should never be that boring or predictable.

The modern brassiere was invented 100 years ago today by Caresse Crosby . She didn't like the way corsets of the time looked on her so she designed something that would better show off her figure. And men like me have spent every day since then thanking her for her genius. Happy birthday to the modern bra.

The space shuttle Atlantis landed this afternoon; bringing an end to its career after 32 missions that covered more than 120 million miles. This makes me wonder: what kind of a retirement party does one throw for a space shuttle? Thank you, Atlantis, for bringing our astronauts home safe and making the vastness of space a little bit smaller.

Horray!  The Westin Book-Cadillac Hotel in downtown Detroit was named Best Hotel of 2010 by Michigan Meeting & Events Magazine . They won in the more than 200 rooms category. There can be no doubt that they deserve every accolade. I congratulate everyone involved in their efforts.

There are early reports that Rosie Huntington-Whiteley  is set to replace Megan Fox  in Transformers 3 . She is currently a model for Victoria's Secret. There's a part of me that wonders if Rosie Huntington-Whitely can act.  However, I have to confess that there's an even larger part of me that, quite frankly, doesn't care.

I've been seeing Melissa Theuriau's  face in a lot of advertisements as of late. Normally, I would be thrilled by this. I mean, who wouldn't want to see Melissa Theuriau on a regular basis? The thing is, these ads aren't ones that use licensed photographs of her. There are literally hundreds of screen grabs of Melissa Theuriau available on-line from her time as an anchor on M6 , which is a French cable network. One of ads in question is above. It clearly uses one of the screen grabs of Melissa Theuriau that I also found on-line. Rather than license these images, or hire a model and photographer so they can create their images, these companies simply grab some of these other images. One would presume that a network in France is less likely than others to notice copyright infringement for ads that are primarily viewed in North America. However, one has to wonder about the credibility of companies that would steal content like this.

There are moments when I'm actually flabbergasted by something that I see. This is one of them. Cassandra Smith is a Hooters waitress out in Macomb County. She was disciplined and placed on a "weight probation" at her work. And how much does she weigh? She is 5' 8" and weighs 132.5 lbs. Most medical guidelines suggest that a small framed woman of that height should weigh approximately 129 - 142 lbs. Not only is Cassandra Smith well within medical guidelines, she's actually on the low side of the spectrum. The folks at Hooters were just plain stupid for disciplining her in this case. If she was somewhere north of 150 lbs. then one could make an argument that she doesn't fit a healthy image. However, that simply isn't the case here. Hooters waitress files lawsuit over weight flap | detnews.com | The Detroit News

I head one of the most interesting of descriptions the other day in regards to Demi Delia , who is reportedly the latest in a string of porn stars to be banged by David Boreanaz . There are fake boobs - and then there are Lee Press On Boobs. Demi Delia clearly has the later. In fact, using my awesome powers of the internet, I hereby proclaim Demi Delia to be Queen of the Lee Press On Boobs. I'm certain that Demi Delia and her family are very proud of this accomplishment.

It's currently 75 degrees in Detroit, with temperatures that are headed into the 80s this afternoon. My company, Prince Igor Productions , has therefore amended its corporate dress code.  Effective immediately, shorts and flip-flops are acceptable in the office. I am the coolest boss ever.

I was downtown the other day. Like many evenings in Detroit, the options for safe yet free parking were at a premium. (If I was willing to pay a few bucks then there were a cornucopia of options, but I'm cheap in that category.) Anyway, one of the things that I came across that evening was this douchebag whose car was taking up two parking spaces. Douchebag! Anyway, I somehow feel better having ranted about this idiot.

I'll admit it, I need to get in shape. Of course, no work out program can begin to compare to the Sexercise Boot Camp program offered by the ladies at Busted Reality. This is one of the funniest videos I've seen in awhile. Busted Reality - Sexercise Boot Camp Atom.com: Funny Videos | Spoofs | Funny Animations

It's a Saturday night. I probably should be at the bar, but I feel like I'm on the verge of getting a cold. I'm staying home and reading instead. I found this article about Rima Fakih and her legendary bikini on Newsweek.com. It was written by Christopher Dickey and puts of a lot of things in perspective. Rima Fakih's Bikini Doesn't Say Anything about Her Islam - Newsweek.com

I've been reading The Economy of Cities by Jane Jacobs  this past week. This is one of those books that I highly recommend reading. One of the points that Ms. Jacobs makes is that the most economically vibrant cities tend to be horribly inefficient and impractical. It's their messy organization, or lack of any real organization, that enables a community to adapt quickly to change. Cities that are extremely well organized, Jane Jacobs points out, are often ill-prepared to adapt to change. Detroit was actually this way prior to the birth of the auto industry. With that in mind, I'd simply like to say that I look forward to Detroit once again being a horribly impractical and inefficient city once again.

Once upon a time, Geoffrey Fieger was walking out of the City-County Bldg. in downtown Detroit and clearly wasn't paying any attention to where he was going. I was driving passed and he stepped in front of my car. If I hadn't hit the brakes in time, Geoffrey Fieger might not be with us. I regret that fact more and more each day.

The Detroit area has produced two major beauty queens in recent years. First, there was Miss America 2008  Kirsten Haglund  of Farmington Hills. She was recently followed by Rima Fakih , Miss USA 2010, from Dearborn. With this many beauty queens in the Detroit area, I can't help but wonder how they stack up against one another. In particular, I find myself wondering which one of them would win a wrestling match. Would Kirsten Haglund emerge from the ring victorious or would it be Rima Fakih? I know that I'm probably a pervert for even contemplating this. Regardless, these are the thoughts that occupy my mind on a Saturday afternoon. Kirsten Haglund and Rima Fakih are nothing if not evenly matched. Both of them are 5'8" tall, according to their respective Wikipedia pages. Their weight and arm length are almost identical. Kirsten Haglund and Rima Fakih also have that same bad ass attitude that is a part of every woman from the Detroit area. Both of them would ...

I have to admit that I'm starting to like Debbie Schlussel , even though she is quite possibly a pedophile . She is so outlandishly stupid that she makes me feel smart by comparison. Debbie Schlussel was criticized by Octavia Nasr in one of the CNN blogs for her repeated attacks on Miss USA Rima Fakih . Ms. Schlussel, in turn, got bent out of shape because Ms. Nasr referred to her as a neoconservative, which she believes is "an anti-Semitic slur." Really, Debbie Schlussel? Really? Neoconservative is an anti-Semitic slur? Really? Neoconservatism is generally defined as being a branch of conservative thought that advocates for using economic and military power to export American values abroad. Wikipedia's entry on it is here . Merriam-Webster Dictionary has a similar definition that's available here . Differentiating neoconservatives from other types of conservatives is relevant simply because they have significant philosophical differences other branches...

Miss USA Rima Fakih  was on Late Night with David Letterman  last night to deliver her list of the Top Ten Things She Wants to Do As Miss USA. I think it was was one of the best Top Ten lists that Dave has done in awhile.

There's a new television drama coming to ABC this fall, Detroit 1-8-7 . It's about a mock documentary that follows a group of Detroit homicide detectives. The show stars Michael Imperioli  of The Sopranos as Detective Louis Fitch, a homicide vet who is respected, but deeply misunderstood. Imperioli is joined by Jon Michael Hill , James McDaniel of NYPD Blue , Aisha Hinds of True Blood , Natalie Martinez , D.J. Cotrona , and Shaun Majumder .   Detroit 1-8-7  is coming to Tuesdays at 10 p.m. on ABC this fall. I'm looking forward to it.

Dale Peterson  is a Republican running for Agriculture Commissioner down in Alabama. His campaign released what has to be one of the best political commercials I have ever seen. The music is a bit loud, in my opinion, but other than that this one is perfect. Heck, even some of the Democrats that I know what to vote for this guy. Can we get this guy to run for something in Michigan?

This past Sunday, Rima Fakih of Dearborn became Miss USA 2010 at a pageant in Las Vegas, becoming the first Arab American and the first Muslim to do so. Within seconds of Ms. Fakih receiving her crown, all of the brain cells in Debbie Schlussel's  head evidentially exploded. Within the past forty eight hours, Debbie Schlussel has authored five blog posts on her web site that made derogatory accusations about Rima Fakih. With the exception of the one where she discussed Ms. Fakih's moment of pole dancing three years ago, none of her accusations have had a single shred of credible evidence presented to back them up. Debbie Schlussel, for example, accused Rima Fakih of supporting Hezbollah. However, she did not present anything to back that allegation up beyond the fact that she is a) Muslim and b) was born in a part of Lebanon where Hezbollah is quite active. One should, therefore, point out that Debbie Schlussel lives in a part of the country where a pedophile ring...

The Irish aren't drinking as much as they used to. The end result is that 15,000 jobs have disappeared. The way I see things, that works out to roughly 15,000 fathers in Ireland who would be quite grateful to anyone who could rescue their local economy. They presumably have at least 15,000 Irish daughters between them. I don't know about anyone else, but I sense a tremendous challenge with an even more impressive reward in this situation. Irish abstinence from alcohol leads to loss of 15,000 jobs | Irish Business | IrishCentral

Rima Fakih  became the first Arab American and the first Muslim to become Miss USA yesterday. I blogged about it over on the Warrendale (Detroit) Blog , since she lives so close to my neighborhood. There has been a lot of excitement about her victory. Unfortunately, neither Rima Fakih nor her family and friends were able to enjoy this news truly for very long. A photograph of Rima Fakih that was taken by a local radio station in Detroit three years ago emerged this morning. It shows her dancing on a stripper pole. She was fully clothed - and it was all part of a promotion that the station was doing - but she was still dancing on a stripper pole. All day today, when I'm sure Rima Fakih and her family would much rather have been enjoying her win, there has been this seemingly endless barrage of chatter in the blogosphere about this photograph. There have even been a people who have speculated as to whether or not she would be stripped of her crown as a result. Personally, I ...

I saw a rabbit while I was downtown this past Saturday. I'm not sure exactly why  seeing a bunny rabbit in downtown Detroit amused me so, but it did. I felt a need to both photograph said bunny - it was a tiny one, probably fairly young - and blog about it. And now that desire has been satisfied.

I got an email from the folks at eHarmony this morning. Its subject line read, "An Offer You Can't Refuse." I was curious so I opened it. They offered me three months of their service for only  $19.95. I've tried eHarmony before and was, to say the least, unimpressed with their matching. I have to say, that was one of the easiest offers I've ever refused in my life.

Phillip DeFranco  (a/k/a sxephil on YouTube) came up with a new line of t-shirt designs recently. I love this one. It's brilliant in its simplicity. Of course, this is one of those designs that really only works well when it's worn by a woman. (Please take a close look at where the plate of sandwiches is, if you don't understand why it's designed to be worn by a woman.) I also love the fact that this shirt is out in time for National Women Bringing You Sandwiches Day .

I have to admit that I'm a little worried about the weather we're having in Detroit right now - heaving rains that don't show any signs of stopping soon. The scariest part, though, is that I drove past the Detroit Zoo earlier today. There was this old guy with a really big boat out by the place. He was rounding up two of everything.

MeTonyV just released a cool video entitled MeTonyV vs. Alanis Morissette . It's basically his way of explaining to his Mom that everything is alright for him out in Los Angeles. I love this one.

I simply love this music video. The song is cool and the video itself, well, it has its merits.

I have an idea for a movie. It's called Confessions Of An Editor . It starts when this established editor meets a young, out-of-work writer with loads of talent that she isn't using. He decides to take her under his proverbial wing. In between cocktails, because our editor is a prolific drinker, he offers suggestions on how she can establish a freelance writing career for herself. He also introduces her to the people who care hire her. All seems well until this writer falls madly in love with a young man. They date briefly, but he ultimately rejects her affections. The writer, of course, is devastated by this rejection. Eventually, the writer and editor start seeing each other socially. There's no romance between them. Instead, it's more of an on-going companionship. Things, however, take a dramatic turn when the writer reveals that she has been having anxiety issues. She tells the editor that she has these intense panic attacks whenever she sees her ex-boyfri...

I blogged earlier today about Heidi Montag and her apparent desire to have breasts large enough to flash the guys on board the International Space Station. It turns out that Heidi Montag has set off a backlash of sorts in Hollywood. Several people in the business have started to decry the overuse of cosmetic surgery. Heidi Montag is the moment where plastic surgery jumped the proverbial shark in Hollywood. (You can read more about this over on HollywoodLife.com .) All I have to say is, it's about time.

I want to congratulate everyone at NASA on their Webby Awards this week. The Kepler Mission website was one of four NASA websites honored by the Webby Awards for their excellence in technology and creativity. For the second straight year, the NASA homepage was honored with the People's Voice award in the government category. NASA Home & City 2.0 was selected as the Webby winner, which made it an agency sweep in that group. NASA's Jet Propulsion Laboratory also won the People's Voice award in the science category for http://climate.nasa.gov . Again, my congratulations go out to everyone at NASA. You guys rock my world and search for new ones.

Heidi Montag  has already scheduled another round of cosmetic surgery. According to Life & Style magazine, she wants her breasts to be even larger. For the benefit of anyone who doesn't already know this, Heidi Montag already has DD-sized breasts. This means that Heidi Montag's breasts can already be seen from outer space, at least on your more sophisticated satellite photographs. Presumably, making them even larger will make them even more visible. All of which makes me wonder: Does Heidi Montag have some serious self-image problems? Or is she simply trying to flash the guys on board the International Space Station? I personally think she's trying to show some love to the space station. However, there is always the chance that I'm wrong.

I was watching this new video from iJustine this afternoon. It was actually a little scary because there were a couple of moments where some of movements and voice mannerisms gave me this sudden flashback to women that I've known over the years. Thankfully, I don't have anyone in my life currently who reminds me of that.

I want to take a quick moment to wish everyone a happy Star Wars Day . Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I am a nerd. Of this, there can be no denying. May the 4th be with you!