Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Boob Jobs and Bras

I've been thinking about breast augmentation surgery a lot lately. It was one of those weird moments stemming from a recent weekend encounter where - okay, I'll just say it - I was reminded that it's possible to tell which part of a woman's breast is real and exactly where her implant starts, if she has one.

Heidi Montag Has Cold Boobs
The result can be, well, odd at best. Sometimes, however, it can be downright disturbing.

Oh, and did I mention that the temperature of a woman's breast varies if she has an implant? The part of it that is an implant is colder than the natural part.

This is also kind of disturbing.

Very, very disturbing.

It's enough to make me feel sorry for any guy who ends up in the bedroom with Heidi Montag. (I mean, not sorry by a lot. Just a little.)

All of this makes be believe that an old-fashioned padded bra is a lot better than a boob job. They're both nice to look at. However, a Wonderbra or the new BioFit from Victoria's Secret doesn't have all of the weirdness with it.

Better Than A Boob Job
Granted, the aesthetic benefits, if you will, disappear when the bra comes off, which is the one area where a boob job is better. However, I'm fairly confident that by that time, most guys would lost in the moment enough to not care.

If a woman were in a position where she was spending a lot of time topless (e.g., exotic dancers, porn stars, or American Apparel models) then it would be a different matter all together. However, for almost all women, I've come to believe that a bra is better than a boob job.

Plus, a woman can get a lifetime supply of bras for less than the cost of a boob job. This allows her to spend her money on other things, like shoes or buying alcohol for one blogger or another.

4 comments:

Shondira said...

Frank, you never cease to amaze me. AND YES, they're natural.

The Words Crafter said...

Woohoo!!!! *standing up clapping* Finally, a man who sees the light!!!!

And, when these women are 70 or 80, the only things gravity aren't going to get are the fake boobs. And won't that look weird!

Me-I'm just getting a tattoo. Or three....(starting my mid life thingy early and it's cheaper than a new Mustang)

FrankNemecek said...

@Shondira: To quote Teri Hatcher's character on "Seinfeld", "They're real and they're spectacular."

@Words: Gravity can effect fake boobs, too. The implant is in there with the natural tissue. Once the natural stuff starts to go, the implant goes along for the ride.

It looks kind of like normal sagging boobs, but with a ball inside of them.

Yeah, one more reason why a bra is better than a boob job.

Terry said...

Nice read! :D I prefer push up bras over a boob job too, though I have nothing against women who do it. Anyway, who doesn’t want to enhance their cup size, right? But yeah, breast augmentation is not for everyone. In fact, if you think you can live happily without it, then do so! Otherwise, give it careful consideration. It’s not something to be taken lightly.

Terry Bayer